21 October 2022

HEMA, check this out!

HEMA is a ubiquitous chain store in the Netherlands, selling an odd combination of cosmetics, accessories, stationery, homewares, snacks and drinks. I know it best for the rookworst, a heavily smoked sausage which makes an ideal breakfast or snack, especially when going to a beer festival. Buying one at the HEMA in Leiden station is part of my regular Borefts routine, about which more next week.

When I saw that Utrecht brewery vandeStreek had turned the rookworst into a beer -- Rookworst Weizen -- I snapped it up. It's 5.5% ABV and dun-coloured, containing nothing more involved than smoked malt. And yet with that it channels the sausage perfectly, with a rich and meaty smokiness. Schlenkerla's Weizen is my least favourite of their beers because the smoke clashes with the sweet weissbier esters. Here that side is dialled  back considerably, leaving the smoke a clean space on which to operate. I kept having to remind myself that it's meant to be a daft novelty because it's extremely well put together. This seemingly throwaway idea is a treat for anyone who likes their smoked beer thoroughly smoked.

It's not the only novelty beer HEMA has commissioned either. Zaandijk brewer Hoop, cousin of Dublin's Hope, has brewed Pepernoten Bier, another one that very successfully recreates the food item it's influenced by. This time, however, it's not as enjoyable, partly because pepernoten are disgusting and partly because their taste does not go well in a beer. What you get here is a clear reddish brown ale that smells not just of herbs and spices, but of all the herbs and spices: an unholy mish-mash involving cloves, nutmeg, aniseed, basil, tarragon, mint and white pepper. All these and more jostle for position in the flavour, energised by a powerfully sweet malt base, with a yucky stale gymbag twang for bad measure. A lasting note of toothpaste in the finish suggests something cleaner and fresher than it actually is. At 7% ABV it could have been heavy and sticky too, so there's one small mercy that it isn't. Still, even with my tolerance for novelty beers, this just didn't work. Proceed with extreme caution.

If, then, for some reason, you find yourself doing your beer shopping at HEMA, I hope you find these pointers useful.

4 comments:

  1. Anonymous1:29 pm

    Well, finding pepernoten generally disgusting, you basically disqualify yourself as a proper judge, knowing that Sinterklaas is pretty much about pepernoten. But I can tell you that probably all (our) Pepernoten Bier will be sold even before the man himself will set foot on Dutch soil mid november.

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    1. He can count himself lucky that nobody will be leaving any out for him.

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  2. You should never assume posts like this are not going to be useful to anyone else. As it happens, I was in the Netherlands when you posted this and picked up a can of rookworst beer (I was going to get two because you said it was good, but then I remembered you liked that horrible Revelation Cat muck).

    I liked it well enough but didn’t find it all that smoky. Do you get the Mattesson’s smoked sausage in Ireland? It’s much, much milder than the HEMA version and I thought the Vandestreek beer is to Schlenkerla what Mattesson’s is to the actual HEMA rookworst.

    HEMA is also very good for cheap notebooks and razor blades.

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    1. I vaguely remember Mattesson's from my time in the UK but not well enough to use it as a taste descriptor. And yep I filled up on notebooks at HEMA.

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