Dropping a twenty

Way back in September, the PR firm for the supermarket Aldi sent me a no-strings €20 voucher. The German discounter has been upping its game recently, as part of the bigger war between the grocery giants which has had beer as one of the fronts for a couple of years now. I thought it would be an interesting experiment to see what sort of a selection €20 buys, beerwise, in Aldi these days. Of course, a more sensible and rational human, one without a blog to feed, would have blown the lot on Spaten, a beer which offers about the best quality-for-price ratio in the country. Would I be able to find the beatings of that?

I managed eight different beers before running out of new ones, and didn't even clear the voucher, spending €19.62 in total.

It was just before Halloween so there was a selection of Wychwood offerings available. We begin with Dr. Thirsty's No. 4 Blonde, a whopping 4.1% ABV and a middling lager-yellow. There's a definite caskish feel about it: low fizz and a loose head. I was expecting dull but there is real character here, beginning with a spicy incense aroma. That intensifies on tasting, turning to dry cedar balanced by a bubblegum sweetness and a gentle green bitterness. It sounds busy but it's light enough to carry it effortlessly. This is easy-going English blonde ale done exceedingly well.

So a tough act for Hobgoblin Gold to follow. Another blonde ale, this time a direct brand extension from Wychwood's dark flagship. There's a smidge more alcohol at 4.5% ABV and with a surprising haze. An off-putting funky aroma is how it says hello, and the flavour is roughly acidic as well, with worrying gastric overtones. Hobgoblin isn't the best beer in the world but it's inoffensive. This is rather more extreme. There's maybe a softer element of stonefruit in the background: lychee if you're feeling charitable. Overall, however, it's quite grim stuff.

Williams Brothers supply the next two, starting with Re#Dial lager. "What's this? It's got a good beat!" exclaims the label. It does look well: a flawless golden hue topped by a handsome layer of pure white foam. The aroma is the first sign of trouble: sour and sweaty, like a forgotten gym bag. After the effort of pouring I wasn't sure I wanted to taste it. It wasn't as bad as I'd feared: a little over-sweetened, and yes there's a tinny twang that doesn't belong in decent lager, but the flavour is unobtrusive enough that it can be downed quickly, refreshing as it goes, and not cause offence. It's a mere 4% ABV, and if it wasn't for that woeful aroma I'd go so far as to describe it as sessionable. The texture is probably its best feature: light and spritzy, the carbonation in the Goldilocks zone below fizzy but well above flat.

Its stablemate for this round is Iconic, an American-style pale ale. This one is all Cascade, the ABV rocketing up to 4.4%. It certainly smells of Cascade: that classic, earthy, marmalade-and-metal aroma. It looks well too: the body clear and the head tight. It's another sweet one, with a flavour that's primarily spun sugar and golden syrup. The hops have the measure of this, however, giving bitter cabbage leaf and sharp grapefruit. The end result is an uneasy balance, with both the malt sugar and hop acid threatening to take over at any moment. It works, though, and while it doesn't taste especially American, it's a decent and light pale ale, one which is particularly good value at just €2.19 a bottle.

Medusa is next in line, brewed for Aldi by Marston's under the supermarket's "Harpers Brewing" fake brand. It's a red ale and the label promises "roasted chocolate". Eh? Who roasts chocolate? It's a lovely dark garnet colour, tinting red around the edges and topped by a thick layer of creamy snake-free head. The aroma is a very strong caramel and apples vibe, slightly headache-inducing and every inch of the powerhouse 5% ABV. The green apple is dominant in the flavour, and it's not pleasant, tasting like a harsh chemical solvent. There's no softness, no nuance, just aggression, and not even the good sort. An attempt has been made at something rich and autumnal but it hasn't worked out. This beer tastes of pure hangovers and half a litre was a struggle.

Apprehension, then, going into Wild Bill's IPA, from the same producer. It's a worrying dark brown colour and is once again 5% ABV, with rye and unspecified American hops mentioned on the label. It smells bitter and spicy, which is fine, but the flavour is simultaneously sugar-sweet and harshly astringent, neither of them making for a pleasant sensation. There are hops too, funky and resinous, interacting with the dark malt to create the sweaty taste I often find in amber ales and really do not care for. This is another pass from me. I get how it's been put together but  the harsh aspirin and tin astringency strips it of merit. As far as the UK beers go I think the Williams Brothers take this round with Wychwood in second place.

To Germany next, and an Aldi stalwart I've never tried before: Rheinbacher Weissbier. Seemingly it does actually come from a real place called Rheinbach, just outside Bonn. It's surprisingly dark for the style, looking more like Schneider Weisse than any other mainstream weissbier. Bananas in the aroma? Present and correct, though not overdone. The flavour is a little muted, reflecting perhaps the slightly low ABV of 5%, but I like that. It's very easy to drink and the bubblegum sweetness doesn't clag up the palate. There's enough crisp grain character to clean it off, and even a tiny touch of dry roast. This is a perfect budget weissbier and I don't think I could ask more of it at €1.49.

All that still left me well short of the total so I topped it off with a ten-pack of stubbies. I quite like this format for easy-access, swig-from-the-bottle, lawnmower lager. This one has probably the least imaginative name in brewing history: Brasserie. "Quality Brewers" and "Bière Supérieure" exclaims the packaging, in an almost pleading tone, alongside depictions of what look like competition medallions but aren't, as though it totally could win some, if it wanted to, like.

I was just happy that it wasn't skunked. Cardboard sleeves appear to provide better protection against UV than science was aware. Should one decide to pour it into a glass, one will find it flawlessly clear with lots of bubbles, almost resembling a glass of champagne. Almost. It's only 4% ABV but actually tastes like less: it's very thin and makes you work to find any flavour. There's a slightly contrived malt sweetness -- a bit like powdered malt extract -- and a sharp green bitterness which might charitably be described as grassy, though there isn't enough of it to describe it as anything much. Like I say, this is fizzy and thirst-quenching and isn't really designed to do anything else. There's not a thing wrong with it, however.

A couple of genuine bargains in this lot, particularly on the paler side of the spectrum. I'm still going to advise you to buy Spaten, however.