Russian to judgement

Once again the Polonez grocery chain has scratched my itch for seeking unfamiliar beers in foreign supermarkets. This time it's an all-Russian affair, beginning at their selection of Moscow Brewing Company beers.

Zhiguli Barnoe takes its name from a famous Moscow restaurant. It's a lager of 4.9% ABV and an enticing deep and wholesome amber colour in the glass. The aroma is clean and malt-forward, reminding me of the heavier sort of Czech 12° pale lager, and Budvar in particular. All very promising. Sure enough, weighty golden syrup follows through in the foretaste, backed and balanced by a mild grassiness that suggests real Saaz hops (or similar) to me. From the cheapie half-litre can, I was getting macro vibes from the outward visuals but this has not been assembled on an industrial assembly line from extracts and additives: it's a real beer in the central European vernacular. There's even a little buzz of complexity on the finish; some honey and rose petals with a pinch of black pepper. The texture is full and satisfying, rounding out a very jolly experience overall.

Presumably because all non-Russians are lightweights, Zhiguli Barnoe Export is lower-strength: 4.8% ABV, and you really need to squint at the small print to find that out. It's a fair bit paler too, bringing back fears of mass-produced dreck. The aroma is unimpressive though not unpleasant: normal bland-lager vibes. And yes, it's very plain. There's a mild toasted grain foretaste but not much beyond it. I looked for hop character and there's maybe a slight green cabbage bite, but that's me being charitable. It is at least full-bodied again -- thinness would be unforgivable -- but it's very boring fare. It could serve as in inoffensive party beer, but nothing more involved than that.

The final beer comes from AB InBev's Russian operation and is one of their core brands. Stary Melnik ("Old Miller") exists in a number of different versions and I think this is the basic pale lager. It's a light shade of gold and 4.5% ABV. Now here's that artificiality I had been expecting. There's quite a plasticky twang off this, and indeed hop extract is admitted to on the label. The soft bready texture is probably its best feature but that's not saying much. A minor malt sweetness precedes the plasticky off-note, and it all fades out quickly in quite an unpleasant watery way. I had thought the fancy embossed bottle would land me something interesting but it once again goes to show how deceptive outward appearances can be. This is a steadfastly dull low-grade industrial lager and that's all you get.

And I guess that's the lesson for this post, inasmuch as there is one. Drink the beer first, then decide whether it's any good or not.