The big shop

For some years now, Lidl has ruled supreme in the own-brand beer space. Its "Crafty Brewing" range by Rye River runs from damn-decent to exceptional, largely depending on one's opinion of the styles produced. Quality is built in. Now Tesco looks to be taking a challenge to them with its own "Hop Seekers" line-up. There's no saison or American-style brown ale yet, but five mainstream styles form the vanguard, all brewed at Pearse Lyons Brewery in Dundalk.

First is Wild West pilsner and on opening it I was suddenly reminded that the brewery also brews Manislav pilsner for Tesco (and Strana for Aldi) from the aroma: a big damp grass funk which speaks of Saaz in quantity. The body is nicely full. I was worried about that as it's weaker than the aforementioned beers at 4.5% ABV, but I've no complaints about the soft, authentically Czech, texture. The flavour does let it down a little. It's quite bland, with only a faint hint left of that fresh green hopping. The beefy malt offers some compensation, giving it wholesome seedcake and oat cookies. This is pleasant drinking, even if it's more fun to sniff than to sip. Further proof that all of Ireland's best pilsners are supermarket own brands -- although Lidl hasn't managed a decent one yet, curiously.

At the same strength, a pale ale is next: Crooked Creek. There's plenty of citrus in the aroma, but a sweetness too; a suggestion of juice in line with contemporary fashion. It is mostly clear though, with just a faint haze to indicate that all the life hasn't been filtered out of it. And it hasn't. It wears a properly bitter lime rind and grapefruit juice up front, in a pure and unfussy 1990s American-craft way. And then later there's that modern twist, giving a slightly sweet and spicy lemon sherbet buzz. I can't pick any holes in what it offers: a clean, stimulating, mouth-watering taste, in a generous measure at an approachable strength for a reasonable price. A proper fridge-filler, then.

What remains is IPA, and we move up to a High Peak next, at 5.1% ABV. This is a warm golden colour, and slightly hazy but still within the parameters of the west coast sub-style. It's nowhere near as punchy as the pale ale, however. The aroma is a juicy kind of citrus, with mild notes of mandarin, while the flavour is soft and warm, offering orange cookies rather than actual fruit. It's fine, but a bit bland, tasting much more like a compromised supermarket cheapie than either of the other two. The branding suggests America but perhaps they should have gone for a landscape closer to home as this has most in common with restrained English-style IPA, though it's not an especially good example of that either. It's inoffensive though, so I guess if you want to drink IPA but have an aversion to hops, here's the beer for you.

After that, I didn't get my hopes up when it came to the professed "juicy IPA" Tropical Shore. By rights this 6%-er should be an opaque yellow emulsion with sweet and fruity hop aromas and flavours. But supermarket bottles have to sit in the warm for a year or more, so that would have been a poor idea from the start. Instead, to no surprise on my part, it's a mostly clear copper colour and predominantly dry and bitter: a rasp of metal and a squeak of dried lemon peel, against a background of highly tannic stewed tea. Any sweetness is malt-derived, though there isn't much of it: fruitcake and cereal bars. This is even more English-tasting than the last one. The description on the label does mention the malt and citrus character, but the all-caps "Juicy" on the front still makes it misleading. It left a bad taste in my mouth which had very little to do with the recipe.

That was such a shock that I need to digress for a moment. As well as this set for Tesco, Pearse Lyons also brews the "Journeyman" own-brand beers for Musgraves. And a recent addition to these was one labelled as "Juicy IPA". It's 5.9% ABV which would suggest it must at least have something in common with the beer above, and could even be identical. Did they make the same mistake again? I got hold of a bottle at the earliest opportunity, and sure enough it's another clear copper job, despite the label telling us it's "hazy and bursting with fruit flavours". It is not. Tea and lemon peel; fruitcake and zinc, and that's your lot. To have one pseudo-juicy IPA out in the mainstream is unfortuate. To have two looks like cruelty.

But back to Tesco. The Hop Seekers range tops out on Deep Sea double IPA, just about meeting the spec at 7.5% ABV. It's a dark orange colour and smells sweet and sticky, like cordial or hard candy. There's quite an about face in the flavour, then: it's fully bitter, at the expense of everything else. It's a harsh and waxy sort of bitterness, and it's hard work to find anything else behind it. There's a certain breadcrust chewiness from the malt, but no softness or warmth. The hop flavour is still orangey, but all pith and peel, without any sweetness. All things considered it's a bit of a chore to drink, and unless you enjoy having your palate bruised, I don't see much to like about it.

This sequence really lost its way in the later beers. I genuinely thought we had a new range of accessible classics on our hands after the first two. Still, we must look to the positives, and both the pilsner and pale ale are well worth your time and your €3. Now about that brown ale...